Let’s see, about five weeks ago it all started.

A trip to the RE, to make sure all the tests had been performed, everything looked good, and my uterus was a healthy one, ready for a baby.

Then it was on to Provera.  Five days of it.  It’s always hell on Provera, but this time wasn’t too bad.  About 5 days after that, AF arrived.  That was cd1.  That was April 7.

CD2, April 8 – baseline u/s – it’s a go!

CD3, April 9, I started on 75iu of Follistim, 0.5mg of Dexamethason, and continued on 1500mg of Metformin a day.

CD5, April 11, I increased my dosage of Follistim to 150iu for two more days.

CD7, April 13, ultrasound and we see some little starts of follicles on each ovary.  They do b/w and it comes back with E2 only at 85.  Based on this, I’m instructed to increase Follistim again to 250iu this time (holy crap).

CD10, April 16, ultrasound, still small follicles, but getting bigger – around 10-14mm each.  I’m starting to worry a little about multiples, I’ve never responded like this before.  E2 taken, and I’m instructed to stay at 250iu per day.

CD12, April 18, ultrasound, and the follicles are at 12,13,14, 16mm – E2 taken, and I’m still instructed to stay at 250iu per day.  Nerves keep building up.  I’m almost expecting to cancel the cycle based on the # of follicles developing.

CD14, April 20, ultrasound, and the RE says “today it’s HCG day.”  I am shocked, because I thought for sure there would still either be too many or not big enough.  But he tells me I have three good follicles at 17, 18, and 19mm.  By the time we do IUI they should be 1-2mm bigger each.  I ask about risk of multiples and he gives me a 10% chance, with that being mostly odds of twins.  Sounds reassuring, so why am I still so nervous?  He tells me my E2 on CD12 was just under 500.  I get a phone call later that day from the nurse telling me my E2 came back at 4932.  YIKES.

CD15, April 21, arrive at the satellite RE office in town, and another RE sees me.  I ask for u/s for “one last look” because I just want to make sure we didn’t miss something.  He explains to me that an u/s 24 hours after trigger won’t tell us much of anything.  He’s right.  He asks me what I’m worried about and reminds me that at the end of the day, my RE saw three healthy follicles and that’s what they look for – 3/4 follicles is considered perfect to them (versus my history of 1 to 2 lead follicles in the past).  We proceed with IUI.  Chris’s count is at 87 million, 94% motility – couldn’t ask for anything else.  I ask the RE about OHSS and he blows me off.  We both go to work.  That night I’m highly uncomfortable, most likely ovulation pain.

CD16, April 22 IUI#2.  Another RE this time again, this one cautions me about OHSS and tells me if I become pregnant I could become very sick.  At least he was nice enough to take it seriously.  Chris’s count was 40-something million and 97% motility.  Great again.  Chris went to work after his drop off, and I did this one alone.  My first IUI alone – EVER.  I got through it, and came home to work remotely.  I’m still uncomfortable but not as bad as the night before.

CD17-19, April 23-25, feeling pretty ok.  Some bloating and discomfort but ok.

CD20, April 26, all of a sudden feeling miserable.  Extremely bloated.  Gained 4lbs.  Hard to move around much and sleeping is pointless.  Laying flat makes it worse.

CD21, April 27, still uncomfortable but working from home and tolerable.  Again, no sleep the night before.  Rolling over, it feels like my ovaries are twisting or touching each other.  I woke up that morning, and while trying to sit down on the toilet to pee I had this excruciating moment of pain.  And it was so bad I got light-headed and felt like I was going to pass out.  Ironically a few minutes later I was starting to feel much better.  The day progressively got better.

CD22, April 28, still no sleep the night before.  Weird how I felt ok that day before but nighttime seemed to bring out the pain again. Once I was up, I went to work (boy was that fun trying to find some pants that fit – had to break out some elastic waist capris), and I did ok the rest of the day.  A little achey here or there but not bad.  By evening I was feeling good, and took two Tylenol PM to try to get some rest.  Went to bed at 9:30pm.

CD23, TODAY I slept like a BABY last night.  Boy was that priceless.  And today I feel really good.  I’d say 90% of the aches and pains are gone.  And I’m wearing jeans comfortably today.  I’m half-way through the two week wait.

So that’s my summary.  I still have a lot of nerves.  Nerves that it worked, nerves that it didn’t work.  Nerves that it worked TOO well.  You get it.  Nerves that it worked and then will all go wrong like last time.  Lots of fear embedded in my mind.  Chris has seen me go through a lot this cycle.  He has told me if this isn’t it, he’s ok with being done.  I know he’s not ok with not having more children.  But I also know he is mentally wiped out by it too.  We won’t cross that bridge unless we have to.  I’m not done.

I’ve had a lot of support from various sources.  I’ve probably annoyed some along the way.  You always get the experts that have BTDT, but you have to remember you are a different person, different scenario.   Everyone is different.  Everyone is not an expert afterall.  You just have to go with what you are comfortable with and deal with it the best you can.  Sometimes I have to ground myself, and come back to reality.  Chris is good at getting me there.

So here’s to another week of analyzing every little thing.  Obsessing about the twinges.  Wondering if that’s heartburn because you had pizza for dinner, or is it something else….  I will survive!